Synopsis

A PSYCHOTIC CHILD goes to PSYCHOTIC CHILD SCHOOL to learn how to be MORE PSYCHOTIC at aliens.

It’s SUPER EFFECTIVE.

By the Numbers

• Independence Days: 1
• Indiana Solos: 1
• Back-story skipped: 99%
• Naked children: Mercifully, fewer than the book
• Psychotic children: All of them
• Psychotic adults: Also pretty much all of them
• Eyes burrowed through: 1
• Hannah Montana characters: OH GOD WHY
• Minutes of training required to become Super Zero G Combat Flange God: 5
• Naked child ultraviolence: present
• H.R.Giger & Company Interior Decorating contracts: 12
• Highly variable Ben Kingsley Accents: 1
• Surprising plot twists: 0
• Progressively more crap sequels set up: 18 and counting
• PEW PEW: PEW

Overall: 4 / 5