Twilight - Breaking Dawn part 1

Synopsis

POUTY McANGSTFACE finally gives in and marries her CREEPY EMO STALKER.  Then they FUCK and ANGST ABOUT IT.  Then she is PREGNANT, and they ANGST ABOUT IT.  Then there are WEREWOLVES, who ANGST ABOUT IT.  Then BELLA DIES, and…

BELLA’s SECRET VAMPIRE POWER is the ability to DIAL SOMEONE with a SINGLE SWIPE from the HTC SENSE LOCKSCREEN.

By the Numbers

Overall: herp / derp

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